dead insect

Billie Jean LED Shoes

2010-02-21T17:45:00.003Z

These are shoes attached to LED floor tiles, equipped with a pressure switch so that they light up when you step, just like the Michael Jackson Billie Jean video.

I had this project lying half-built around for ages, but lacked the will to finish it, as I went through this phase of being unable to do any fancy dress without getting a giant sinking empty feeling inside. In the end I'm glad I finished it, it's one of the best outfits I have ever made. They are much fun/funnier that I thought they would be - people just start dancing around you.

My new thing for projects is trying to make them from as little newly purchased stuff as possible. For this project I had to buy the polycarbonate (£10), the LEDs (cheap - about £5) and the electronics (about another £5), but the shoes and wood are scraps/charity shop.

In the future I will modify them so that they have a "flash on and off" mode as well as pressure mode.

For those who are into it, you can see how they work on Flickr

The Oxford & Cambridge Goat Race 2010

2010-02-16T01:06:00.003Z

Image from Michelle Bower

Just an early warning to say hold the date, The Goat Race is back, at Spitalfields City Farm, just near Brick Lane, on Saturday 3rd April 2010 (Easter weekend). Same day as a similar sounding sporting event.

Image from WowtheWorld

If you'd like to get involved with either the Goat Race, doing a stall or activity, promoting something, or the afterparty, get in touch.

I finally built a site for it at www.thegoatrace.org , and you can join us on Facebook at bit.ly/goatrace .

We are taking on board feedback from last year - more activites and fun surrounding the race, and a better organised afterparty. So stay tuned.

eilidh cairns

2010-02-06T13:22:00.003Z

Our close friend Eilidh Cairns was killed in a cycle accident a year ago yesterday involving an HGV. I went down to the accident spot at Notting Hill Gate - right on the man road near the tube - yesterday to hang out. Some friends of ours have done a nice plaque and ghost bike for her - it's the first 'officially sanctioned' (by Boris Johnson) ghost bike and won't be removed.

To all of us who cycle, please take care. Lorries really can't see you at all so stay well clear. Peace and love, Ant

engraving things

2010-02-01T15:17:00.003Z

Last year, when we built that multi-touch installation in the Science Museum, I relented and got a Dremel Multi-Tool. I had always thought these were a tool for dads to buy off the advert and never use, or a bit of a toy that doesn't do any job particularly well. But it turns out that for little, crafty things, which I do quite a lot, they are excellent.

The magical Abelha putter

I especially like using it to engrave things. You can make any dull, manufactured object unique and special just by engraving it, and I also feel it imbues objects with personality and magical powers. I find it quite difficult, but am getting slowly better.

my fragrance launch

2010-01-22T18:51:00.004Z

Photo from ::AJ::

Those of you who know me a little better will know of my strange fixation with R&B megastar, Usher. So, thus inspired, I am turning 30 and to celebrate I have created my own signature fragrance:

30 - Pour Elle, Pour Homme. The new fragrance by Anthony Goh.

Yes, really. The fragrance has been hand made (by me and my mum) from scratch in extreme limited edition of only 50 bottles (10ml), all individually signed and numbered by Anthony Goh.

The bottles will be for sale at the launch event (a.k.a. my 30th birthday party!!) and all the money from fragrance sales will go to either Haiti Earthquake support or the Celia Hammond Animal Trust in Canning Town. Perfect for collectors or as a gift to a loved one. Facebook for the invite!

got cat

2010-01-11T02:14:00.004Z

We have loads of mice in our house. I don't want to poison them and I have shot a few with an airgun, but I thought getting a cat might be a better way which would also generally benefit the house. I don't really like cats (I love dogs), and didn't really feel anything when I went to get this kitten. But now after a few days, it is making funny noises, running/leaping around the house, generally getting on with Dog, and I quite like it now. Even at 6 months old, it is pretty coordinated and driven to destroy fast-moving mouse-like objects, so I have high hopes for it to rack up a good body count this year. I am going to call it 'Cat'.

spice rack

2010-01-05T15:03:00.004Z

I built a spice rack. I wonder how or why these became such universally comic/tragic symbols of domestic dullness & misery. Anyhow, I quite like it. It is a vast improvement on the previous shoebox.

I had a think and my personal domestic nightmare is probably to be half of one of those couples with matching shiny new mountain bikes and matching cycle helmets.

2010 resolutions

2010-01-04T01:47:00.002Z

This year, instead of making vague statements, or trying to *not* do things (which is really difficult), I made bunches of little objectives across a number of categories which are important to me: Food, Work, Fun, Nature and Personal. The idea is that all these little tasks added up will hopefully shape life more in the direction I am trying to go.

Food

This year focusses on going back to basics: growing, foraging, killing, cooking and eating.

1. Grow and eat 2 kinds of vegetable or fruit in the garden.
This doesn't sound that hard, but I am a terrible gardener. I only have mint, thyme and chives (almost dead) in my back garden because Dog and I just could not kill them, despite our best efforts using claws, drought, biting, urine and neglect.

2. Forage 3 new wild items and utilise them for food (or chutney, soup etc.)
Two high points of 2009 included picking sloes from inside the M25 and the resulting sloe cachaca, and also an amazing wild blackberry crumble. So more of the same this year.

3. Kill and eat 3 different species of animal.
There is nothing more satisfying than catching your own dinner. I hope to maybe catch/eat a couple of new types sea fish (bass?), or maybe a rabbit.

4. Build 6 new food/drink items from scratch.
Last year I set the wholly unrealistic goal of only eating scratch built things (e.g. no bought ketchup, no coleslaw, etc). This year I will try a few new things like beer, jam, tonic water, jelly or a gala pie.

Work

My theme for work is building things with long term value, and generally being freer - getting more control of my time and more control of what kind of work I do.

1. Abelha
has gone well in our first year so me and Hal are mega-excited about the future. We started with the theory that booze makes people happy, and henceforth the more booze we move, the more we get people to spend time happily chatting, chilling, flirting, dancing and who knows what else. So far we are up to something like 17800 of these man-hours of Abelha-fuelled fun. Our resolution is to further increase the peace around the UK and world.

2. Work freelance less, and more on developing own projects.
(about 1:2 ratio of freelance to own projects)

3. Get the wheels going on one new product or service with long term potential.

4. Do about 165 days of work in 2010.

Fun/Art

This is the easy section. I think it's really important that we try to bring lots of moments of beauty into other people's lives (as well as our own). For me this means craft, sort-of-art, events, and general silliness.

1. Make the Goat Race bigger and better this year.

2. Do another installation piece in a gallery or festival.

3. Develop our multi-touch screen into new useful object.

4. Build a piece of art that has ongoing development/usage potential.

5. Do our jousting party bigger and better this year.

6. Make the DogBox club into a regular self-sustaining thing.

7. Build three hats that I designed ages ago but still haven't made.

8. Make one sustainability-related project.

Nature

I sometimes get an awesome sensation of peace and awe in beautiful natural surroundings - mountains, sunsets, lunar eclipses, etc. I knew when I got Dog that I wanted to spend more time outside, exploring; also, being a bit of a nerd I've always had a keen interest in nature too. I want to spend less time on the Internet too, and just to slow down a little.

1. Observe and sketch the 12 Zodiacal constellations.

2. Observe and sketch 10 Messier objects (e.g. galaxies, star clusters).

3. Pick/sketch/photograph 12 UK wild flowers.

4. Catch a falling leaf.

5. Observe and sketch common cloud types (if I ever have a kid, at some point they will ask about clouds, and I will feel like a bit of a cunt if all I know is that the wispy ones are good and the big grey ones are bad).

6. Mark the equinoxes with some kind of cool sculpture (this is the goal I am least keen on, and to be frank it sounds a bit druidic, but I like the idea of building a modern stonehenge).

Here's to 2010!

compost bin

2009-12-28T01:50:00.003Z

This year I have been thinking a lot about waste. Today I built a compost bin, which felt good as it not only didn't cost anything, but it used up all these mangy palettes that have been cluttering the front yard.

Tower Hamlets give us these brown waste food bins, but my main thinking around waste is that it's really important to dispose of as much of your own stuff as possible, rather than relying on council services. This is so that we're aware of how much stuff we are using - if we had to personally dispose of every single bit of non-degradeable rubbish we bought, we would definitely use less of these things.

Another aspect I find interesting, that's pretty unfamiliar to me, is that I've built something, but have no idea if it will 'work' until about a year. Will the palettes rot away? Will I get bored of it? Will I screw up and kill all the composting organisms? Who knows. In this day of fast response, throwaway stuff, it's really refreshing to have projects like this.

I found instuctions on how to build a compost bin from palettes from the Gardeners World website, good grief, never thought I'd end up there.

How to make a terrarium

2009-12-26T12:04:00.004Z

I had a spare lightbulb that I had hollowed out left over from another project so I made it into a terrarium for my mum for Christmas.

It's very easy to make, you hollow out a lightbulb, then add regular soil, then stone or bark (I used bark) that has a load of moss on it. A dramatic rock adds good zen effect too - I used a chip of slate stolen from the garden centre.

No special tools required, though I used a few cotton buds to clean up the inside after all the soil had gone in.

Inpsiration from Instructables, one of the fewer and fewer remaining websites that bring me some form of joy.

The other good thing about this is that I still don't really know what it is. I guess the nearest analogy is a pot plant, but it's much cooler than a pot plant.

BBAB Rocky Bar Ads

2009-10-04T20:15:00.002+01:00

I haven't blogged about any ads for about 2 years, but this made me go straight to YouTube. Outstanding work. Who is the agency?

Link to YouTube

Abelha Cachaça Retail Launch at Wholefoods Kensington this Saturday

2009-08-27T14:57:00.006+01:00

Pretty exciting - we (Abelha Cachaca) are working with Whole Foods Market in Kensington as our official retail partner! They will be stocking Abelha Silver and Abelha Gold in their new spirits section, alongside a lot of other excellent, organic spirits.

If you haven't been to the store before, you should do - it's huge, and full of delicious stuff, including a machine from which you can blend and dispense your own fresh pistachio nut butter. We are now giving you the perfect excuse to get down there, as this Saturday 29th August, we'll be down there doing sampling.

We'll be knocking out caipirinhas, other fresh fruit cocktails and a delicious new serve of Abelha Cachaça mixed with Organic Elderflower Presse, all made with things you can find in the store.

2-6 pm, Saturday 26th August.
Whole Foods Market
www.wholefoodsmarket.com
63 Kensington High St
London, W8
020 7368 4500

bicycles

2009-07-05T23:22:00.003+01:00

I'm currently selling my beloved Schwinn beach cruiser for £160. A little info below.

This is my beloved super sweet beach cruiser which I am forced to sell as I have decided to live a more zen-like life. Because of this, I am trying to discard some of my unnecessary earthly possessions, even the ones that make me obviously way more awesome. I have decided that I am still allowed to eat meat and drink booze though.

This bike would suit someone 5'5" to about 5'11", who is either very cool, or aspiring to be cooler.

It is a classic Schwinn american beach cruiser alloy frame, with many of the parts having been replaced with lighter, better parts.

It has a rear coaster brake (back-pedal amsterdam style brake) and no front brake. You don't really need one.

It is relatively lightweight, and not slow as you might think. For example, I rode it from Hackney to Earls Court, and it only took about 45 minutes. On my normal skinny tyred bike, this might take 38 minutes. So it is a very comfy bike to commute even relatively long (London) distances on. This is owing to the sit-up riding position and the giant, double sprung suspension seat that is like a DFS sofa. She is even pretty lively through traffic.

I am selling it for £160. The bike is in great shape - tyres are almost new, brake, cranks, are all tip top. I have just given it a good servicing and re-painted the front fork.

cheers, Ant
anthony.goh@gmail.com

Image from lookingatdamascus

On another note, I have been working on a new bicycle, which I am building up bit by bit. Because of this, I have been looking at other bikes - I have found the sweetest store which sells these amazing stretch cruisers - if I wanted a new bike and had about 550 quid to spare, I would deffo get one...

MJ

2009-06-26T10:50:00.004+01:00

No other single person in our generation has made as much of a global cultural impact as Michael Jackson.

Dance is a universal human language of joy and self expression, and there are 5 years olds in every corner of the planet, from the slums of North Korea to the to Amazon Basin, who have learned to moonwalk.

So whilst I'm not really sad - he was past the point of sanity/normality, a troubled soul, and probably a paedo, I think it's nice to remember his gift to the world.

When Michael Jackson first brought the glide/moonwalk to the world
Link to YouTube

and 10 year old MJ is his big purple hat singing "who's loving you"
Link to YouTube

PS - Reports that Michael Jackson died of a heart attack are false. In fact he was found in a children's hospital having a stroke.

my take on Project Natal

2009-06-03T21:11:00.002+01:00

At the risk of sounding old and grumpy, this is a great bit of technology, but the execution of it just looks really boringly obvious. Because of this, I just don't believe that Microsoft will create amazing innovative games that will have the same impact on non-gamers that Nintendo did with the Wii.

To illustrate what I'm thinking, let's say Microsoft had launched motion sensing controllers before, or at, the same time as Nintendo. You know exactly what the games line-up would have been like... classic shooting, sword-wielding, or driving games, which use the controller in the most obvious way possible, with the focus on slick, realistic, overproduced graphics and non-casual play.

Compare Wii sports to any of the newer sports titles on the PS3 or Xbox 360. They may be ostensibly sports titles, but the entertainment proposition is just totally different.

Not to say I'm not a fan of this but the demo here is just really game developer/tech led - there is no insight or human innovation here.

OH MY GOD, I HAVEN'T GOT A DRESS FOR THIS PARTY.

video of our RFID art thing in action at the Science Museum

2009-05-27T14:10:00.006+01:00

So I now have video from Neil of our installation in action. It's built on our home made multi-touch screen, which allows users to paint or draw using their hands or an empty brush.

The idea is that users copy a picture and submit it. The software then creates an composite image based on all the submitted user images. As more and more people submit images, the composite image starts to look more and more like the actual image.

It's based on the idea of the Wisdom of Crowds - a theory which basically states than in the right conditions, the averaged guess of a crowd will consistently beat any single expert's guesses. An example of this is sports odds - the odds (which are formed by a huge number of people all guessing and hedging) are a more accurate predictor than any single expert, over time.

Sum of its pArts from Apex on Vimeo.

There's also a write up and video of the Takeaway Festival 2009 here at Jotta, an online community arts portfolio site.

I really enjoyed working on this. it's the first bit of interactive art, or in fact any art I have done. I was mostly surprised at how possible it is to build devices that on the outset seem impenetrably complex, and has given me loads of ideas for the future.

Here's the posh write up of it.

Sum of its Parts

Brief Synopsis
The Sum of its Parts is an experiment in collaborative art. Over the course of an exhibition, participants take turns to reproduce iconic pieces of art. After each interpretation, the average colour is calculated for each pixel to produce the current collaborative work. This installation was exhibited at the Science Museum's Dana Centre in May 2009.

User Experience
In it's rest state, the installation cycles through the original pieces of art. Next to the original, the participants' interpretations are shown being composited together. Once the composite reaches its current state, it pauses briefly before the next original is shown. Participants are instructed to touch the screen to begin. On touching the screen, they are presented with a selection of four works they can reproduce. They select one of the works by touching it at which point it grows to fill the whole screen. On touching the screen it fades away to leave a blank canvas the same colour as the background of the original. There is a menu that allows participants to see the original again, show a palette or submit their painting. After using their hands or a brush to interpret the original and selecting to submit, they see their painting becoming part of the collaborative work. The installation then returns to its rest state.

Tech Spec

Hardware
1 x Laptop running installation software
1 x Multitouch Table Sending TUIO signals over OSC

Multitouch setup for the installation at the Science Museum consisted of:

4 x 780nm 25mw laser
4 x 90 degree line splitter
1 x Unibrain Fire-I Monochrome Webcam
1 x IR Filter
1 x 150cm x 113cm sheet of Perspex
1 x Projector
1 x Sheet of drafting film for back projection

Software
The software for the installation is written in Java. The blob tracking was done using Tbeta.

takeaway festival opening night tuesday 19th may 2009

2009-05-13T01:00:00.003+01:00

For the past couple of weeks I've been working with Neil and Simeon, building a giant collaborative art touch screen thing. It involves lasers, loads of wood, and cameras, and it's been a nightmare to build so far. I have almost cut all my fingers off numerous times and accidentally shot myself in the eyes with high power infra-red lasers.

This is all for the Takeaway Festival - a fusion of technology, music and art - happening at the Dana Centre, SW London over a couple of weeks starting Tuesday the 19th May. It's without a doubt the nerdiest thing I have ever been a part of, but it feels good.

I would love if it you came down to the Tuesday opening night (they have beer), or if you can't make it, you can see our installation anytime after that for a couple of weeks. See the details below.

Here's a picture of us prototyping the device.

Takeaway Festival Schedule

The Festival opens Tuesday May 19th with our first day of workshops and our Opening Evening 7.00-9.30

The Exhibits and Interactives are open from Tuesday May 19th until Saturday May 30th
Entrance is Free
Exhibition finishes on Saturday May 30th 15:00
Please note: The exhibition is also open on Monday 25th May (Bank Holiday)

Opening times: Monday to Friday 10:00 - 17:00
Saturday 23rd May 12:00 - 17:00
Saturday 30th May 12:00 - 15:00

For workshops and evening events you will need to book in advance so please call 020 7942 4040 or e-mail tickets@danacentre.org.uk

Oxford and Cambridge Goat Race 2009

2009-04-12T15:38:00.002+01:00

I hereby declare the First Annual Varsity Oxford and Cambridge Goat Race to be a total success. An edited thank you note from Anne Hopkins, Goat Race co-founder:

Thanks to the 300+ of you who chose Goats over Boats on Sunday – it was awesome and ridiculous in equal measures and most importantly raised over £700 for the farm. Thank You.

Our favourite squat-legged friend, Cambridge, barreled in first on the day in front of the rather more willowy Oxford with a time of 52.6 sec. Go the under-goat!

We can’t get enough of giggling at shots of the goats muscling their way along the course, so please do send us your pics (simeonrose@gmail.com) or add them to the Facebook event page or put them up on the net and tag them goatrace2009.

Photo from Tanya Hudson

Huge thanks to go to Cookie for his brilliant design work, Ben for winning tunes, Hal for race-calling and general fine-sportsmanship, Paul for playing Bookie, our nimble-needled knitters, La Fromagerie for the cheese (which Sam Williams won…eventually!) AND of course to the Spitalfields City Farm for letting us run with this random idea in the first place.

(Sorry about the drinks bungle, we were there with free booze but the pub wouldn't let us serve it to you due to a miscommunication -- we will make it up to you next time, promise!)

Anne, Simeon & Anthony

See the pics here on Flickr.

Anthony Goh http://www.deadinsect.co.uk
Abelha Cachaca http://www.abelha.co.uk
Anne Hopkins http://www.snap-shot-city.com/
Simon Cook http://www.made-in-england.org/
Pigsnoots http://www.myspace.com/dothedirt
Magic-ish http://www.magic-ish.com/

london metropolitan police ads: remixes

2009-03-30T18:14:00.003+01:00

the parody, originally uploaded by robbroccoli.

I am generally a very unpolitical person, but I strongly believe that this ridiculous fear-mongering ad campaign from the Met Police is a really bad thing for society. It's just daft and harmful. So I thought I would post these remixes, from a Boingboing remix competition. Who is the ad agency responsible for these originals?

Photo from Antony Bennison

Photo from Timbearcub

See all the entries here

McGangBang Review, Old St, LONDON N1

2009-03-20T09:13:00.003Z

I'd forgotten the joys of working in an office, where you are mostly in front of a computer. The buzz of the Internet surrounds you constantly, like bugs in a rainforest, and bits of it fly at you - mostly dull, ugly, biting and and irritating, but the occasional beautiful butterfly lands on your shoulder.

This is how I felt when I read about the McGangBang. Exec summary: kids in the USA order a whole McChicken Sandwich INSIDE a Double Cheeseburger, and nickname it a McGangBang. It's popular to the point where some branches know what it is, and serve it.

I love eating at McDonalds, and I love innovation. One of my highlights of last year was going to McDonalds (Commercial Road) drive through on a tandem bike and ordering everything from the PoundSaver menu - 8 items for £8.22 (some things on the pound saver menu don't cost a pound), and asking if anyone had ever done that before. (They hadn't). I was of course inspired by my favourite thing on YouTube, MrChiCity.

Without further ado, my review of the McGangBang.

Ready and ordered. They had no idea what I was about to do.

At this point I start to feel slightly wrong. Not guilt, more physical icky-ness. Like having to touch a really big insect.

The McGangBang is assembled. Looks good, smells good.

One of the greatest joys about bad bread sandwiches is squishing it -like squishing a fishfinger sandwich made with cheap white sliced bread. The McGangBang squishes well, it holds together nicely too (unlike Big Macs, which have a remarkably low snack cohesion coefficient).

Eating: Actually pretty good. The McChicken sauce lifts the flavours out nicely and the crunch of the McChicken adds an interesting interplay of texture. the only incongruous element is the lettuce, which is mercilessly overpowered. It all physically holds together too, and weirdly, the extra bread doesn't matter too much. 8/10.

Conclusion

This burger originates from McDonalds in the US, where they have a McChicken Sandwich on the Dollar menu, so the whole thing only costs £2.16. This make a lot more sense. Next time I will try it with the Mayo Chicken on the Pound Menu.

I find it interesting to note that:

1. The greatest creativity, as ever, comes from constraints - kids who needed the most un-hungriness from the cheapest items at McDonalds created this.

2. It was first mentioned on Urban Dictionary in May 2006 - 3 years ago. We sometimes think that the Internet makes everything instantly famous, but things can take years to get noticed.

eilidh cairns bike ride on ITV

2009-03-13T09:12:00.001Z

Eilidh was a good friend of ours and her bike ride was on ITV. Paz y luz.

Eilidh Cairns Memorial Bike Ride from Giles Carlin on Vimeo.

The Oxford and Cambridge Goat Race 2009

2009-03-12T22:17:00.003Z

On the same day as a similar sounding event, Sunday the 29th March 2009, we will race two actual goats along a difficult, meandering course lined with cheering spectators.

It's a charity event from Anne, Simeon, me (and Cookie and Nicky) to help raise money for Spitalfields City Farm, situated just behind Brick Lane.

So come down, browse Brick Lane market, cheer on the goats, and then we'll all go to a nearby pub or bar for a free (or at least very cheap - I am negotiating with some places now) drink.

=====Programme=====

2:00pm doors open

Donation £3 to enter. (100% of all money taken goes straight to the farm).

Amusements:
** The Official Goat Race Bookie and Sweepstake
** Goatee competition
** Goats in Coats on Boats which Float in Moats Game
** Goat Hoopla

3:30pm The Race Starts

4:00pm Prize giving ceremony

4:30pm Afterparty

We retire to a nearby pub or bar, with DJ and a good drinks offer (likely a free cocktail) for those who attended the race.

=====Dress Code=====
Strictly: Black Tie, Rowing lycra, boat club jackets and ties, or goat.

=====Date and Location=====
Sunday March 29th
Spitalfields City Farm, Buxton Street, London, E1 5AR
Click here for map
Nearest tubes: Whitechapel 5 mins, Bethnal Green 5 mins, Aldgate East 5 mins

So that's it.

It's going to be loads of fun - if you want to come, why not get involved with the pre-race banter on the Facebook event page here.

If you'd like to be involved, running a stall, or helping out in any way, let me know too - my email address is on the top right of this blog.

See you there!!

repair manifesto

2009-03-10T17:00:00.001Z

4375-454-803, originally uploaded by ed100.

too true. related to my earlier post on our toilet that broke.

Goh's Law and an Eco-rant

2009-03-01T16:40:00.005Z

This is the air flush button for our toilet. This button is attached to the cistern by an air tube. If you have a toilet with a flush button that that isn't actually on the toilet, chances are it works like this.

The point is, it's broken, after only about 2 years. We do not push this button particularly hard or often. That is a very very very short time for something like a toilet flush, compared a regular toilet flush.

Here's the second point. I can't fix it. The rubber inside is split, so it doesn't work. The dead rubber thing inside it is a specialist part, not a normal sized standard thing you buy in a plumbing store. I can't find exactly where to get one online either. So it looks like I have to buy a whole new button which costs £20.

This trend is happening across all manufactured goods sectors. For example, washing machines and dryers are at the point now where they are just about as difficult and expensive to repair as to replace, especially as manufacturers have no incentive to sell cheap spare parts. Even good guys do it - go look at how expensive spare parts for a Dyson Vacuum Cleaner are compared to the new unit.

In the old days, if you knew a little electronics, and your stereo broke, you would have a fighting chance of fixing it. Now, no chance. In more and more categories, it's getting cheaper to get a new one than repair.

This leads me to Goh's Law:

Every N years, devices become twice as likely to fail, and twice as difficult to repair.

N is a constant for a given industry.

Aside from being annoying for people like me, it is incredibly wasteful and irresponsible for manufacturers to make stuff like this. In an age where we are probably heading towards a global energy and natural resources crisis, this is simply not on.

How can we help? As punters, buy stuff that is built to last, and buy stuff that is built with standard replaceable parts (as much as possible).

James Bond is an absolute lush

2009-02-28T21:09:00.007Z

I'm reading Moonraker (1956, Ian Fleming). It's the best book I've ever read. I'm halfway through the book and about 24 story hours have elapsed. In this time, all Bond has done is go to the office, then go to a card game, all the while getting horrendously drunk, and high on speed. I also have lost count of the number of fags he has smoked.

A Day in the Life of James Bond

Lunch (so I didn't count this) - half a carafe of White Bordeaux

Gets briefed, goes home.
Checks himself out naked in the mirror.
In the evening at Blades, the most exclusive card club in London:
Vodka Martini (Dry)
Bond explains to M that he has to get hammered to pull off tonight's card sharping hustle.
M eats a marrow bone using a silver spoon.

1 whole bottle of Dom Perignon '46, most of which he downs by the glass, and about half a gram of Benzedrine (speed).

He took our a thin packet and carefully opened it under the level of the table. It contained white powder. He took a silver fruit knife off the table and dipped the tip of the blade into the packet so that about half its contents were transferred to the knife. He reached for his glass of champagne and tipped the powder into it.
"Benzedrine," he said. "I rang up my secretary before dinner and asked her to wangle some ... It's what I shall need if I'm going to keep my wits about me tonight. It's apt to make one a bit overconfident, but that'll be a help too." He stirred the champagne with a scrap of toast so that the white powder whirled among the bubbles ... "It doesn't taste," said Bond, "and the champagne is quite excellent."

3 fingers of Vodka, with a dash of black pepper in it.
1 cup of very black, very strong coffee
"a fat measure of pale brandy" (Rothschild Eastates in Cognac)
Another entire bottle of Dom Perginon '46 (he again downs 2 of the glasses from it)

I went to the Drinkaware site (which reminds me - I dislike the current-ish "You wouldn't start a night like this" radio and TV campaign by the way - daft strategy, I will explain later) to check Bond's units consumed whilst on HMSS.

It's 24.2 units in about 5 hours, from 8pm until around 1am. The equivalent of maybe 10-12 pints while he's playing cards and having dinner. It's not just an excuse to talk about fine brands, and getting smashed plays an integral and exciting part of the plot of these books, which doesn't come out in the movies at all. Excellent.

You wouldn't start a night like this....

On why I dislike those anti drinking ads. I think the proposition/idea is good, and the executions are great too. Really viceral, clever twist on things, etc.

I have no doubt that when you show these ads to people in a focus group, they will all respond and say something like "That has really put me off drinking, made me think twice." However I also have no doubt that these same people will still go out drinking. They will then get -almost- too drunk, then someone will say, have a shot of this, at which point they will probably not be thinking of this ad. Then they will be trolleyed and we are back to square one.

This is for 2 reasons:

1. The strategy is a pure moderation one, and it doesn't give people a solution, or an alternative behaviour to use
2. It doesn't address the moment at which the problem occurs

Have you ever toilet trained a dog, or trained any kind of animal? Then you will know that if you want it to stop doing something (chewing shoes), the easiest and best thing to do is provide an alternative behaviour, that you reward (chew rubber bone instead of shoes). The key thing about the alternative behaviour is that it's realistic, fun, and that it makes it impossible to do the un-desirable behaviour at the same time.

If you have ever tried to control, chastise, or reason with a very drunk person, you will also know that telling very drunk people or animals about what they can or can't do after or before the event is near-useless. Drunk people have little sense of past reasoning or future consequences. You must catch the bad behaviour at the moment they do it.

So, IMHO, a good strategy would be to provide moderately drunk people with an alternative behaviour that prevents them having "the excess drink" which sends them over the edge.

I don't know what this behaviour could be, but the key thing is that it can't be just "don't have a drink." Something about pulling could maybe work.

Another thing to do would be some actual research into how people get too drunk. My pointers for more general topics would be:

* Get people to go out later, or go home first then meet up later to go out, rather than straight to the pub from work.
* I suspect research would show there are key people within social groups who catalyse excessive drinking. (This includes most of you who are reading this). Perhaps something making it socially unacceptable to nudge your mates into drinking more than they can handle. If you make your mate drink, you could KILL him/cause her to get RAPED.

Poor ideas, but you get what I mean?